It’s nice to have friends and family visit. But when they don’t respect your house rules or exercise proper etiquette, it’s hard to get excited when they want to come over. Here is a list of things people say are their biggest pet peeves when they have guests.
1. They Don’t Give Advanced Notice
Not everybody’s house is always clean, and many like to wear nicer clothes or put on some makeup when they have visitors. It’s common courtesy to give people some advanced notice that you would like to come for a visit.
“When I don’t know they’re coming until they’re on their way or at my door. Like, dude, I need to mentally prepare for visitors and clean up a bit, I need some warning!”
“Not giving me a heads up that they are coming. I work full time and I have kids, so my house is often not what I would like it to be. I don’t care if they say they don’t judge. It makes me feel more at ease to tidy before people see my house.”
“Not being given any notice or them not asking first. I don’t get much time to myself, I hate people dropping in unannounced just when I have all my work/ cleaning/ cooking etc. done and am all set to throw myself on the couch in track pants.”
2. They Don’t Know When to Leave
Yawning and stretching out on the couch is usually a direct sign that the homeowner is ready for bed. Some guests don’t pick up on it, and it’s annoying when people overstay their welcome.
“You can ask when you arrive what time would be ideal for you to head out later. Just ask them what time they plan on winding down just so you know and then respect that unless they super insist that you stay later on.”
“I hate it when people stay really late. I have never figured out a polite way to get them to leave so I can go to bed. Personally I would consider it rude to stay at someone’s house after 11pm unless it was a big party.”
3. They Leave the Toilet Seat Up
Putting the toilet seat down is always proper etiquette, especially when visiting someone.
“Men who leave the toilet seat up. It’s my (female) and my boyfriend’s home and these men go into our bathroom, see that the toilet seat AND the toilet lid are down, don’t think about the fact that it might be like that because we prefer it that way and walk away with the lid up. Then I have to touch the gross lid to put it back down.”
4. They Won’t Leave Your Pets Alone
“Chasing after my pets to pet them when they clearly don’t want to or disturbing them when they sleep.”
“I have a strict rule that no one picks up my cat, because she hates it.”
5. They are Nosy
For some households, quickly cleaning up for guests may require temporarily transferring the clutter into another room. They don’t want you to see the mess, so don’t look for it.
“I hate when they are nosy. Opening cabinets or going in the refrigerator lol”
“When they casually check out our rooms. Like why? Stay in the living room please.”
6. They Leave Trash Behind
“When they leave trash anywhere other than the trash can. You’d be surprised how many grown adults just leave their trash on the counters or coffee table instead of getting up and searching the kitchen for the trash.”
“I had a friend/roommate who invited a guy she was casually seeing over which was fine. But this absolute lunatic ate some pistachios and just left his shells on the floor. I didn’t notice until after he left or I would have lost it on him but I told her in no uncertain terms he’s never welcome back.”
7. They Bring a Pet without Permission
Many consider pets part of their family and bring them along just like another child. But some people have allergies or are just uncomfortable with pets, so it’s best to ask permission before bringing them.
“You’re so valid about the pets. People really think they can bring an animal into someone else’s house without asking sometimes. It’s insane.”
8. They Leave Their Shoes On
Whether it’s cultural or out of cleanliness, it’s a good sign that you should also remove yours if you don’t see the homeowners wearing shoes.
“My husband’s family doesn’t understand that concept and it drives me nuts. But he is the one that gets to clean the floors after they leave so I can’t complain too much.”
“We had people come over who refused to take their shoes off after we politely asked them… and they refused because shoes were part of outfit and they didn’t have good socks to match. Seriously?”
“I make people take their shoes off at the door. They’re dirty, and I don’t want all that bacteria all over my house.”
9. Unsupervised Children
The same house rules should apply when at somebody else’s house. Yet many readers complained that children try to get away with more while out because their parents aren’t paying attention.
“When people bring over their kids and don’t watch over them. There have been too many times where parents just let their kids run amok in my home and things get broken, ruined or misplaced. My husband and I have had to tell certain friends and family members if they can’t watch their kids and/or their kids can’t behave properly they aren’t allowed in our home.”
“The worst things that have happened have been from peoples terrible kids. Crayons on walls, large planters pushed over, pets traumatized. I’ve got kids, I know the deal, but you keep an eye on your own kids and help fix what they destroy. None of these people seemed to care.”
“When they let their children roam freely in my house and don’t say anything when the children break something.”
10. They Arrive Late
If people know they will be late, they should message or call to tell the host how late they will be, especially if they are invited for dinner.
“If I say dinner is at 6 PM, then it’s served at 6 PM. If you’re late, you’re getting cold dinner.”
“People who are stupid late. 10 minutes is fine but 30 minutes is insane. People complain about traffic but I explain that it hasn’t changed in x number of years so please plan accordingly next time.”
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This post originally appeared on Reddit.