Her Boyfriend Didn’t Pick Her Up During a Winter Storm and It Took Over 3 Hours to Get Home. He Doesn’t Work. Was She Right to Be Upset?

Does she have a deadbeat boyfriend, or was he trying to be safe? A woman and her boyfriend live in an area in Canada that can be hit with brutal winter storms during the season. Her boyfriend has been driving for eight years and has a good car with winter tires. Unfortunately, she has a driver’s license but doesn’t own a car. She isn’t a secondary driver on her boyfriend’s car because she would have to go through is father to ask and isn’t comfortable doing so.

She works at a daycare from 9am to 6pm and is responsible for closing the classroom. Because of her duties, she can’t refuse to come to work due to inclement weather. So she went to work that day but wasn’t dressed as warmly as she could have because she assumed her boyfriend would pick her up, as he does every Monday. She was aware that there would be significant snowfall that day. Still, there was no indication to her that she would need alternate travel plans. She says the storm started at 3pm with 2 to 4cm falling per hour and 70 to 80km/hr winds. As a result, there was near zero visibility, plows couldn’t get roads cleaned fast enough, and short commutes were taking well over an hour.

She lives with her unemployed boyfriend thanks to a wealthy father who supports him. She says he sleeps until 3pm or 4pm and plays video games all night after she goes to bed. Her work is generally a 20 to 25-minute drive from their home. She takes the bus every morning and returns home on it Tuesdays and Thursdays. He picks her up from work every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday. It takes her 90 minutes and three different buses to get home. An Uber or cab costs $40 to $60, so she avoids taking this route.

The day of the storm, when she was expecting her boyfriend to come, he messaged her when she was finished work and said he wouldn’t be coming because it would take him almost an hour to get to her because of the weather. He was apologetic and said, “I hope you don’t hate me.” She was annoyed, but she understood at the time.

So she was forced to stand in blizzard conditions for 35 minutes waiting for the first bus and 40 minutes outside for the last bus. She was completely soaked, drained of energy, and angry. She hasn’t mentioned anything to her boyfriend, but she asks readers if she is justified in feeling upset that her boyfriend didn’t come and get her.

Thousands of readers responded, supporting both parties. 

“I’m confused… If it was “near zero visibility” then how was he supposed to drive?”

“Him driving to get her would have been DANGEROUS! It’s maddening how many people are cavalier about getting behind the wheel in dangerous road conditions.”

However, some did feel that her boyfriend could have planned ahead and left earlier to come and pick her up.

“I’m from Minnesota and have my fair share of blizzard experiences. I think being outside and wet in a blizzard is a lot more dangerous than driving in it.”

“You gotta get home somehow. If he wasn’t inconsiderate, he would have thought ahead and left home early to get her.”

Some went even further to question her boyfriend’s lifestyle choices and her relationship with him. A few also observed that he is rich and yet he didn’t offer to pay for her to take a cab or Uber home.

“I’m from Colorado. Fully know about driving in a blizzard. Leaving someone to wait for the bus/walk is much worse. In addition, busses have terrible traction, so the risk of an accident was much greater. All of this begs the question of why she is with an unmotivated, lazy loser in the first place. OP, think about the larger choices here! And, start taking driving lessons, even if you can’t yet afford a car. You need to look out for yourself; this man does not have your back.”

“He’s rich enough to not need a job and it was HIS responsibility to get his girlfriend home that day. OP is dating a loser.”

Readers are mainly divided on whether her boyfriend should have picked her up during a storm or not taken the risk. Could he have planned ahead and left earlier? Was she better off standing outside in the cold and dark and changing three buses to get home?

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The post originally appeared on Reddit.